Body Language Flirting — All in the Arms

There’s a funny quirk of reading body language in people:  the higher up in the body you go the better conscious control people have, while the lower you go people act more and more involuntary.  This is why a good liar can control his/her face perfectly, but a great one can even control the angle of their feet.  When it comes to reading body language flirting, this means the arms are right in the middle between voluntary and involuntary…and an important part to study.

The first upper body signal to consider is the hands.  When you’re flirting with a girl, is she opening her hands towards you, or closing them off protectively?  One particular gesture that I’d like you to look out for is the hand present:

woman blue heels Body Language Flirting    All in the Arms

Note how here she is bending her wrist and showing her hand.  Imagine the same angle as she sits at a table, with her elbow down and the hand up, pointed at you or off to the side.  This is a clear flirty sign, and one well work watching for.

When a girl is feeling closed off to you–read:  disinterested–she’s instead going to hold her hands inwards towards herself.

woman blue heels closedoff Body Language Flirting    All in the Arms

On a more basic body language angle, the arms can give important signs about her overall mental state.  If she’s crossing her arms, she’s feeling defensive.  That could mean that you’ve done something to make her uncomfortable, or that for whatever reason she doesn’t trust you.  If you’ve just met her it isn’t necessarily a terrible thing, however, if you’ve known her for some time it’s a clear signal of dislike.

Meanwhile, arms wide open is a signal of trust and comfort.  If she’s relaxed into her chair, arms spread out and body presented, she’s effectively showing herself for you to admire.  This is another flirting signal worth being aware of.

Finally, bear in mind that while most girls don’t consciously control their arms, there are some out there who do.  A true playerette can give you signals like this over and over again to get you to do something for her.  At a bar, this can translate to her giving you five minutes of flirting signs followed by asking for a drink.

At the same time, I’ve rarely met girls like this out and about.  It’s worth being aware of, but for the most part, girls are only going to give you flirty upper body signals if they feel some draw towards you, often unconscious.

When it comes to flirting body language, it pays to take note of the arms.  They’re not as 100% revealing as the lower body, but can reveal her interest before she’s even aware of it.

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