Signs a Girl Likes You — Contact, or Lack Thereof

We’re going to take a step back from looking at physical signs a girl likes you, and instead, take a look at the psychological side.  Namely, how much does it matter who contacts who, and how often?

Many times when a guy is wondering if a girl likes him, he’ll take a look at how often they text or Facebook.  This definitely gives some clues, but at the same time, is easy misunderstand.  

The problem is that some girls are naturally chatty on those mediums…with anyone they consider a friend.  So, if Sara is occasionally posting to your Facebook wall, but also posts ten links a day to her various BFF’s, then you can’t take it seriously.  At the same time, if she never seems to do anything on Facebook, but is suddenly posting links to YouTube vidoes or the like on your wall, then you can take it as a sign.

Another factor of women flirting is that sometimes they will do “practice runs” on platonic guys that they know.  They may be sending you :; and LOL’s galore in their texts, but again, you can’t necessarily take this seriously.

Now, here’s one element that is a good tell:  what is the balance of first contact between the two of you?  If you’re always the one to send her a text or to start IMing, that tells you something completely different than if she’s regularly the one contacting you.

Anyway, I want to give some practical advice, so after pointing out some of the pitfalls of reading these signs, let’s consider a few rules of thumb:

1.  Timing matters.  If she always instantly responds to whatever you send, then you’re a priority.  On the fliipside, if she’s comfortable ignoring a text from you for eight hours…then you probably don’t rate.  As you get to know a girl, you’ll figure out how naturally fast she is at responding, which will give you a baseline to know when she’s more or less into you.

2.  Pacing matters.  If you send her a single text message and she sends you three back before you get a word in, then she’s seriously investing in you.  On the other hand, if you have to send a couple texts for every one that she sends back, then you’re probably not on her radar.  Harsh, but true 90% of the time in my experience.

3.  The quality of contact matters.  She may respond to everything you send her in five minutes or less, but if you’re getting a bunch of texts like “ok lol” then she’s not putting much into you.  Generally speaking, she should be writing at least as much as you, and ideally more.  If she won’t invest in texts/Facebook/whatever, she’s not likely to invest in person.

To read the signs a girl likes you, keep in mind both the timing and pacing of your communications, as well as the quality.  If all of these are strong–ie she gets back to you fast, at least sometimes contacts you first, and gives you substantial responses–then you’re good to go.  If one or more of these is missing, then by all means go for it but be cautious for your own sake.

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